CHAPTER II

The personality of a great man has its reflection in the attitude of those who come into his orbit and are influenced by his conduct. It is therefore informative to see him through their eyes, because their close contact preserves details which a distant survey fails to note. Thus, a judge in the high court for thirty-two years, a Pali scholar and a one-time bhikkhu, observes:

"The occasion whereby I came across the Abbot and his teaching was of special significance to me. For at that time Thailand was in the throes of war (1945), with bombs falling out of the skies upon Bangkok and its environs, with the purpose of ousting the Japanese. Because of this I found it wise to retire for the time being and retreated to the suburbs. I took the opportunity at that time of visiting various Wats (temples) so as to increase my knowledge of the Buddha Sasana. I received much fresh and peculiar knowledge in this way.

"However, it struck me as also something strange that when I displayed my desire to get down to active practice of Vipassana and asked for light on this matter, the information I received was not made clear and failed to appease me. It was as though such knowledge was top secret. So it seemed to me when in some temples I saw boxes full of books labeled in Cambodian letters outside 'Vipassana'. I could make out the lettering because I had studied Cambodian, I wished indeed to know what the boxes held but dared not open them without permission. Receiving no satisfactory reply to my questions I received instead the impression that Vipassana was something to be found only in ancient books, as something antique.

One day as I was seated talking to an old lady, a neighbor of mine, who had also retreated to the suburbs to evade the bombs, a man came along and started talking about how he had once learnt Vipassana from a nun. I pressed for more information on this point, expressing the view that Vipassana was the practice of meditating on dead corpses. The old lady cut in at once, saying that was not Vipassana but only meditation on impermanence. I therefore asked her what Vipassana was. And was told that it was the investigation and perception of the realms of heaven and hell and Nibbana.

"I was confounded. The man who was present was also amazed. Never in my days of learning the written dhamma had I heard it expressed like this before, in such a casual tone. It is true that in the scriptures there was mention of Moggallana Thera and others visiting such places, but there was no mention of that being Vipassana. As for Nibbana, it was beyond thought or speech, as far as I was concerned. Nevertheless, the old lady persisted in her view, saying that she would give me a book to read, concerning the teaching of the Abbot of Wat Paknam.

"However, it was much later that I came across a book dealing with the Abbot's meditation techniques. Again I was astounded. Especially when at the end of the book it said that there was much more knowledge to be gained, but only for the advanced student. It is needless to say that I was in a dubious mood. However, thinking to myself that no matter how much knowledge one may already possess there was always still more to learn, and to think one already possessed all knowledge was the conceit of a fool. I decided to find out for myself if there was indeed something to be learnt from the meditation methods advised.

"One day I availed myself of the opportunity and visited Wat Paknam. The Abbot was at the eleven o'clock meal, and there were many seated around awaiting his good pleasure. I went forward to make my obeisances, expressing also my desire to learn. He bid me wait awhile and went on with his meal in silence.

"Eventually, opportunity was offered me to come closer and converse. He began to discourse on the virtues of the Buddha explaining as he went each virtue. As I listened I was impressed by the profundity of his exegesis, expressed in a manner which I had never heard before.

"With the memory of this discourse ringing in my ears, I in the days which followed pursued my intention, of getting to know his teaching more in detail. He discoursed on the dhamma on every full moon and quarter days, as well as Sunday. His discourses leant heavily in the direction of concentration practice. Listening in the temple on these days I realized that if the teaching was not recorded it would soon be forgotten, which would be a waste, not to mention tiring him out by constant repetition, I therefore came up with the suggestion that these oral addresses should be recorded. He agreed to my suggestion, and I started to jot down the teaching.

"As far as I know, bhikkhus who practice meditation seldom possess the happy gift of expression. Those who preached well were more often than not scholars of the written word. However, I learnt later that the Abbot was himself once a Pali scholar, and it was due to this early training that he was able to express all dhammas in the light of his broad background. He would announce his subject in Pali and deliver the sermons in relation to concentration practice, interlarding the discourse with a supporting amount of Pali terms. In this way he never expounded at random but always substantiated his meaning from the Pali text. He relied with special emphasis on the Maha Satipatthana Sutta for this.

"The manner in which the Chao Khun regulated his days, was as follows:

• Leading the bhikkhus and samaneras twice a day, morning and evening, in paying homage to the Triple Gem in the Uposatha, and ending with a sermon.
• Sermons delivered to the public at large on each full moon, quarter moon, and Sundays
• Meditation practices both night and day with the bhikkhus, the nuns in a separate section.
• Every Thursday at 2 o'clock in the afternoon a meditation class open to the public.
• Supervising Pali Institute where qualified teachers taught the scripture.

"Unless absolutely necessary, the Abbot never moved outside the precincts of the Wat, his efforts and time being devoted exclusively to the teaching of meditation. If laymen invited him out to partake of meals at their homes he would evade the invitation by inquiring if another bhikkhu could go in his stead. Nevertheless, he received guests at certain regular hours. Once after the eleven o'clock meal, and again at 5 o'clock in the afternoon. Other than that these times he was usually to be found supervising classes of meditation among the bhikkhus.

"Luang Por (which means father, and was the name by which he was referred to by his disciples) stressed meditation and his teaching leant heavily in the direction of ultimate truth. I have heard him discourse week after week on the various modes of conditionality (paccayas) as found in the Abhidhamma.

"As far as I have observed from close contact, despite the false and unwholesome rumors spread about him, he was free from blemish in all these respects. Besides possessing a broad and profound knowledge of the scriptures, he was a master in discourse, and without an equal in meditation techniques..."
What follows is the account of a layman who after overhearing some remarks of the Chao Khun's was moved to some heart-searching, ending in his request to be ordained.
"Gathering from rumors and the newspapers that a foreigner was soon to be ordained at Wat Paknam on Visakha day, I hastened to pay my yearly visits there and to be present at the ordination rites. Accompanied by a friend, I went to pay my respects to Luang Por on Visakha's eve.

"Many guests were present, and as he talked to them I listened with an attentive ear. Some of the anecdotes he told stimulated profound emotions, so that I was often carried away. Others were tinged with sadness, so that I find it difficult to express. One thing, however, which stuck in my mind was his air of melancholy resignation as he spoke of the ordination ceremony to take place next day. Said he:

"Tomorrow, a foreigner is going to be ordained. He has sacrificed his personal happiness, and leaving his people crossed the seas to seek that which is good and true. To speak the truth, we Thai are Buddhists, who pay homage to the Buddha Sasana. Is it not fitting that we should seek some opportunity to live with that which is good and true, and not let the days pass by to our loss?"

"That night as I lay sleepless in the meditation room, his words continued to echo in my ears. That these foreigners came from far off places to seek that which is good and true. We are Buddhists, so close to the Sasana, and should not we be interested enough to go in search, as they, of that which is good and true?

"My thoughts were in bad shape, and as I reflected on my life up to now I knew not on what to stand. What had I, which could serve me as a stay, steadfast and true? Nothing at all. Each day muddled up in work and a household life, always on the go to build up prospects for the future, just each day ahead. It was all right so long as I could use it all. Other than that there was nothing that this worldly life could do for me. If I went on at this rate there would be no end to all the heartache. There would be no escape from the daily round, and leading such a life without meaning I would simply grow old in vain.

Thinking in this somber strain I remembered the saying that those who know the taste of the dhamma even for one day are better than those who know it not, even though they live up to a hundred years. At this turning point in my life this saying seemed only too true. I was going on fifty-nine, and if I didn't take the opportunity now, then when? I would surely grow old and die in vain.

It was a sleepless night for me. Neither had I a friend in whom to confide to ease my distress, or from whom to receive advice. I had no one but myself. I was my own true friend. But how could I warm or console myself? I brooded over the thought of giving up the household life, full of vexation and pain as it was, without a break. How long was I going to wait? Even a foreigner wished to be ordained. I was much closer to the Sasana, almost like an owner, and could I remain indifferent and fail to receive some solace from it after all.

"The result of these deliberations with myself ended in my decision to leave the household life for good and be ordained. This decision once taken gave me relief, as though a great load had been lifted and pushed away from my mind.

At dawn the next day, Visakha day, I went to Luang Por and expressed my desire, saying: I have been learning this dhamma with you for five to six years now, but still I haven't attained the Dhammakaya teaching. Now I think I possess sufficient faith and courage to be ordained, so that I may have the opportunity to practice in real earnest once and for all.

"He ordained me, according to my desire, and I began to practice in earnest for the sake of that which is good and true. ."

Here follows the account of a bhikkhu who considers his ordination to be a special one, of honor, unique in this respect.

"You would not think that by looking at his broad face and nose, but failing to notice a wrinkle here or there, that this man was going on for seventy. His penetrating eyes and bearing showed him at once to be one accustomed to command, and one did not fail to gain the impression that although his living was plain, his plane of consciousness was not.

"For all the austerity of his appearance, however, in the depths of his eyes as he put forth both his hands to accept the robes I presented, after I had recited the Pali formula requesting ordination, I looked carefully, and saw compassion.

"This of whom I speak is no other than my venerable initiator, Phra Khun Bhavana-kosol (as his title then was), who began to address me:

"You have now had the faith to present the robes in regular seamed condition, which is the symbol of the Arahatta, as prescribed by the Blessed One, in the middle of this assembly of monks, requesting to become a bhikkhu in the Buddha Sasana, as a sign of your goodwill and wish..."

"He delivered this in a plain clear voice, and as he paused for a little breath, lifted up his eyes for a moment to gaze deeply into mine. Eyes which struck me with its strength. And then continued:

"In an ordination such as this, the first thing of importance is to stimulate faith, belief, keenness, firmness, rooted in the Triple Gem, which is the Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha. This is so because the Blessed One is the owner of the Sasana and has granted permission that bhikkhus be ordained. It is necessary, therefore, that you as a first step study the virtues of the Blessed One...'

"He paused, and gazed at me with his penetrating eyes, as though to read whether I was in earnest enough to take in all that he said. He continued to expatiate on the qualities of wisdom, purity and compassion of the Buddha, impressing me with emphasis of depth.

"He kept looking at me over and over again, as though he would impress my image in his memory, however, whenever my eyes met his I quickly slanted them aside, unable to take the power of his.

"He continued to dissect on the merit of meeting and entering the Buddha Sasana at all, becoming its heir. I had to shift myself a little to ease my foot, for it was rather numb and I was tired, not having been accustomed to such positions before for so long. But was determined to fulfill my part of the bargain, and bore up. Luang Por seemed to understand my distress and gazed at me with compassion, as he continued.

"A bhikkhu has to understand what kammatthana is, because meditation is the means whereby restlessness may be controlled, is the way whereby samadhi arises and the base for wisdom henceforth.. .'

"He then went off to discourse about the four elements and the 32 constituent parts of the body, which the novice had to scrutinize and regard as unwholesome. He reduced the formula to only five, giving the Pali words, kesa (hair), loma etc., and telling me to repeat them after him by direct order and reverse.

T

hen all was silence. I waited for him to place the yellow scarf around my neck, and order me to retire to robe myself, as is the usual custom. For as far as I had observed from ceremonies of ordination, at this moment this was always the normal procedure. But he did nothing of the sort, instead he coolly went on:

"Do you recall the hair which was shaved off your head before you came here requesting ordination? Did you not take up little in your hand and scrutinize it?

"I replied in the affirmative, but at heart remained perplexed. For I could not comprehend the drift of all these questions. Completely in the dark I, nevertheless, hurried in my mind to anticipate if there was anything he was testing me with. But before I could discover a solution, he continued:

"All right, then close your eyes and place the image of that hair in the centre of your body two finger-breadths above your navel. Sink it down right in the centre there, in the cross-section as of a string strung from right to Ieft and front to back, at the point of intersection there. Do as you are told.

"I did as I was told but my doubts did not decrease. He continued:

"Sink all your thoughts and memory down into the centre there, and observe carefully.

"But all was dark as far as I was concerned. After all, what did he expect me to see with my eyes closed? Waiting to see what was next, I became more dubious with each minute. I was tired already, and if his intention was to try me out then the test had failed, for I saw nothing at all. Nevertheless, he persisted.

"To his question whether I saw anything, I hastily replied in the negative.

"Stop your thoughts, keep them still. Think of your hair, let it arise; see it, right there in the centre. Try and think of it alone. Do so and you will see'.

"I did as I was told. I do not know exactly for how long I struggled with the thoughts which troubled me. And as I struggled for control, I consoled myself with the thought that all this must have some meaning after all, otherwise he would not be wasting all our time.

"Strange indeed, but after a time I did begin to see something. Slowly it arose in the dark of me, a mere blur. Gradually, however, it grew clearer. It became so clear in the end that it was as though I was gazing at it with my eyes open wide. But my eyes were shut. What was it that I saw? The hair which had been shaved off my head. At this I began to grow rather excited, unable to suppress myself.

"I see, I see!", said I in a trembling voice.

"To his question what it was that I saw, and whether it was hair, I replied at once in the affirmative. At the same time I felt relieved, thinking that all was settled and now I could go out and robe myself. But no, it was not to end as fast as I thought.

Look carefully. That hair which see, in what direction are the ends of it pointing? Which way is the shaven portion pointing? In what manner is the middle portion curved?

I sharpened my sight so as to be able to answer him. And as soon as I saw clearly, I replied. This, thought I, is the end of the matter. But again I was wrong he was commanding me to look on. I obeyed, though not without perplexity. After all, hair was hair, and I had already seen it. What then?

"I sat on trying to do as I was told. To the doubts which arose, I consoled myself with the thought that when he said I would see hair, I saw hair. No doubt, in a moment I would be seeing something else...

"As I sat there for I know not how long, I gradually began to experience strange sensations of bliss. My body was growing lighter and lighter in a peculiar way. Despite the buoyancy of my body, however, the heart of me seemed completely at ease. So at ease, in fact, that I find it difficult to express. The hair which in the beginning I had seen, gradually eased away from my vision, until it vanished and in its place a circle of light gradually appeared, and I felt more at ease than ever.

"At first I saw only a circle of light. Gradually, however, it seemed to condense itself. Then it began to expand. "It was like this for some time, with the circle as large as a gold coin. Radiance, spread out from this circle, and as I gazed on my attention was drawn towards centre. Then I observed that it was really like a clear crystal sphere, in appearance as large as the moon when it floats up in an empty sky. Apprehensive that this vision would disappear, I fixed my gaze thereon. I had lost my sense of weariness in the Iegs, and could not exactly say when and how it had left me.

"Do you see anything else? ", the soft voice of Luang Por came to my ears.

"I see light, a sphere the size of a lime", returned I.

"All right. That is enough for today. Remember this sphere. Whenever you close your eyes you will see it, whenever your eyes are open you will see it. At no matter what time of the day you will see it. You will always see it. In fact, be careful, and never lose it.

"Having opened my eyes, I saw that he was pleased and satisfied. Said he:

That clear sphere is the beginning. It is the path of the Blessed One whereby he attained Nibbana. It is the only path, the straight path; there is no other path. Remember this. Never let it perish from your sight.

With this, he gradually extracted the yellow scarf from the folded package of robes and placed it round my neck, as I bent down to receive it.

"Go now and robe yourself, and return to receive the Triple Refuge..."

"When I lifted my eyes to the clock on the temple wall, I blinked. To my surprise it was 3.36 p.m. I had been seated there in the centre of this venerable assembly for a complete hour and a half. I half kept the Abbot the bhikkhus, my relatives and friends who had come to share in the merit of my ordination, waiting for all this length of time. I alone had caused all the difficulty and delay Luang Por had gone out of his way to show me how to concentrate, to show me the path whereby the defilements are shed away, to enter the coolness and shade, to the wisdom that is the Buddha Sasana. Was it possible? Had this honor really been bestowed me? It had. For there they were, the old Abbot, the bhikkhu assembly present as witnesses ushering me into the brotherhood, and all those layfolk who were my relatives and friends. And they were tired. But Luang Por had not seemed to trouble himself with it at all. He had ignored his own tiredness, and left those folk in their tiredness, just how one person the way to the happy shade. This was a great privilege, and is it any wonder therefore that I consider my ordination on to be one of honor, a great boon?..."

"End of Chapter Two"

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